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After Father’s Day

After Father’s Day

“A good father is one of the most unsung, unpraised, unnoticed, and yet one of the most valuable assets in our society” (Billy Graham).

We’ve just celebrated Father’s Day—but even after the official day, we need to think about some important things regarding fathers. I’ve noticed a trend. There seems to be a move by some in our culture to subdue or even eliminate celebrating Father’s Day. This may seem self-serving because I’m a father, too, but as a tribute to my dad, I want to urge the importance of honoring dads on Father’s Day and on the days after that as well.

My dad used to dislike going to church on Father’s Day because many times he left so demoralized. Many churches give uplifting attributes on Mother’s Day, but on Father’s Day give examples of poor fatherhood or lack of fatherhood. Let the world do the discouraging, we at the church need to encourage.

The benefits to this are displayed in the business world. I’ve worked in an environment of leadership from the negative. Not, “Here is what you are doing well,” but “Here’s what needs fixing.” It was a morale-killer and led to resignations of quality employees.

When I taught business management courses, I used to cite this example I heard years ago.

You have two people in similar jobs in different companies. At one company they say, “Man, you’re doing a great job. You take a lot of load off the rest of us. We really value what you do.”

What does that person do? He does even better next time. He knows he is valuable to the rest of the team, and he takes responsibility for doing his job well.

At the other job they say, “Well, we could do this job without you, but it’s convenient for us right now to keep you. Only don’t get too settled, because we aren’t committed to having you around.”

This person will struggle even to be bothered to do his job and will probably leave as soon as someone offers something better.

If we treat fathers like the first worker gets treated, we will have more successful fathers; if our attitude is that of the other business, we will get fathers who fail and who run away.

Because society says fathers don’t matter, some men make silly choices. They leave marriages and families. They impregnate a woman and leave her to raise the child alone. But let’s not help these few make that poor choice by letting any man think that the role of father doesn’t matter. We know that isn’t true. We need to encourage fathers to know that they matter in their own families.

So dads, we love you support you, and we need you. And not just on Father’s Day.

By: Dave Trouten is the married father of two teenage boys and a Division Chair & Professor of Communication at Kingswood University.

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